Purest of Pain
I'm sorry I didn't mean to call
but I couldn't fight it
I guess I was weak
couldn't even hide it
and so I surrender
just to hear your voice
I know how many times I said
I'm gonna to live with out you
and maybe someone else
is standing there beside you
but there's something baby
that you need to know
that deep inside me
I feel like I'm dying
I have to see you
it's all that I'm asking
Baby, give me back my fantasy
the courage that I need to live
the air that I breathe
Living without you
my world becomes so empty
my day's are so cold and lonely
and each night I taste
the purest of pain
I wish I could tell you I'm feeling better every day
that it didn't hurt
when you walked away
but to tell you the truth
I can't find my way
and deep inside me
I feel like I'm dying
I have to see you
it's all that I'm asking
Goodbye My Lover
Did I disappoint you or let you down?
Should I be feeling guilty or let the judges frown?
'Cause I saw the end before we'd begun,
Yes I saw you were blinded and I knew I had won.
So I took what's mine by eternal right.
Took your soul out into the night.
It may be over but it won't stop there,
I am here for you if you'd only care.
You touched my heart you touched my soul.
You changed my life and all my goals.
And love is blind and that I knew when,
My heart was blinded by you.
I've kissed your lips and held your head.
Shared your dreams and shared your bed.
I know you well, I know your smell.
I've been addicted to you.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I am a dreamer but when I wake,
You can't break my spirit - it's my dreams you take.
And as you move on, remember me,
Remember us and all we used to be
I've seen you cry, I've seen you smile.
I've watched you sleeping for a while.
I'd be the father of your child.
I'd spend a lifetime with you.
I know your fears and you know mine.
We've had our doubts but now we're fine,
And I love you, I swear that's true.
I cannot live without you.
And I still hold your hand in mine.
In mine when I'm asleep.
And I will bear my soul in time,
When I'm kneeling at your feet.
Goodbye my lover.
Goodbye my friend.
You have been the one.
You have been the one for me.
I'm so hollow, baby, I'm so hollow.
I'm so, I'm so, I'm so hollow.
Saturday, November 01, 2008
suddenly learning all over again that there really isn't anyone that you can turn to.
because seriously, no-one really knows...
some time into the night...it just gets worse.
suddenly learning that there isn't anything left.
-Broken dreams-
Friday, October 31, 2008
what is more depressing than a quiet chilly night and all memories surge to envelope the silence?
painful memories, the least to say.
don't want to know. it was bad enough to know.
-Broken dreams-
Thursday, October 30, 2008
time and again disappointed.
thinking it was over..that it was all at peace.
then noticing that maybe...just maybe...it was never put aside.
when more explanations are attempted, they only serve to worsen the situation.
please tell me all were not true.
wanting to believe in the ideal.
causing a chronic headache that work is impeded and the grey matter is pounding silently
losing it.
-Broken dreams-
Monday, October 27, 2008
I guess there comes a time when one has to move on.
but when is the time?
I recall staring at the building, not knowing that it would become the asylum of the situation.
I recall every word said, not knowing that all would lead to greater disappointment.
Yet now I hear the last two words...it wrecks the heart and mind harder. What, then, is the truth?
Why, then, did it happen?
What will the future be...?
DIdn't really want to think about it...but if it keeps appearing in different forms...there's not much of a choice, is there?
Wishing it all didn't turn out that way.
Not sure if it was better to know, or not.
Or maybe..it would've been better if it was never trusted...
A sudden lost.
-Broken dreams-
Sunday, October 26, 2008
feel like breaking down.
afraid to trust?
the truth is no more.
-Broken dreams-
this is wrecking all nerves and normality.
wrecking the heart and mind way too hard.
losing rationality.
nothing to apologize for.
everything - everything everything is lost. every single bit of motivation.
it's too painful to even think. to even consider. to even hear.
stop it.
go away.
nothing hurts more than this.
knowing it was coming - even seeing it way before time.
lost.
lost. totally.
-Broken dreams-
why the move. why the decision.
can things be changed?
NEVER AGAIN.
please...it's so horrible so horrible...
everything...everything is void. everything is useless. everything is meaningless.
everything is lost. everything.
why the darned choice?
NEVER.
it sucks. afraid to trust, or never to trust?
why did i even choose to believe that there was even that ONE truth?
expectations breed disappointment.
I GIVE UP.
-Broken dreams-
All that has been trusted these years were wrong.
There is no truth...
Guess this would be the very last day listening to a voice once believed to be a soother.
Not anymore...
Prove me wrong ... please prove me wrong.
Show that the faith was worthy.
6 years of wasted time. enough.
the rational mind has taken over - time to stop.
way too many uncountable years of ...
must it really happen that way?
prove them wrong. please.
and someone said "today is a happy day - let's not talk about these matters"
If so...
Appreciation to smiles ... and ... new type
but should it be a happy moment to celebrate the interests... or a moment for deep thoughts to linger ... knowing that what has once been trusted, has all come to waste? that...there really isn't any truth...?
that there is only a confirmation for the believe that - there really is no-one.
I am very very very much disappointed. Very much. Disappointed.
It doesn't help.
-Broken dreams-
